grimgrimwar | Dual Post

OOC: This post is backdated to take place during the media lockdown and the journal section is filtered so only people on the network can see it. This is basically the last open post I'm gonna make with Alex before I tie up all of her plot threads and she leaves the story for a while, so if you have any stuff left you wanna do with her before that, let me know. If you have any event threads you'd like to do with her in this post, lemme know where she needs to be.

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Journal:

They're telling me if I cooperate with them on the stuff that happened with the Barians, I'll get a pass for the stuff I did as a Number Hunter. They're sayin' they'll give me a ticket back to America too.

...the robots aren't chasing me around anymore. My accounts got unfrozen, but they took my passport, so I can't just bolt. Guess they only want me to get the hell outta here after I answer their questions.

...

...guess that's that then, huh.

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Event:

[Alex is on the island that was a part of the Barian World. She's observing the various fallen weapons that are strewn about, occasionally lightly putting a hand on one or picking it up for a couple minutes. She seems to be lost in thought.

She can also be elsewhere, if need be.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I didn't, either.

It's... unreal, to me. I keep thinking I'll end up waking up, and I'll still be there...

...

[Alex pinches her.]

*What the-- oh, I get it.*

... I know I'm alive and here right now, don't worry.

Are you sure? I can do it again.

No, I think once is enough.

I'm consciously aware that this is all real. It's accepting it that will take a while.

*she falls silent for a moment, thinking*

...okay.

...mind if I ask how you're doing besides that?

I don't mind at all.

... I want to say I'm doing fine. I'm not suffering any injuries. In fact, any injury I might've sustained was apparently "reversed", by how Tachyon described it. ... Personally, I can't begin to understand it, but I think it's better than the probable alternatives.

...even when you come back in one piece, dying's no picnic.

[Sigh.]

... That's why I want to say that I am fine... but I'm really not. It might've been reversed, but I still remember it. *her hand hovers over where she was stabbed through, before she clenches it.*

I've "died" before, in the sense that my body has been destroyed. It's happened a number of times, from one circumstance or another. It was always hard to recover from the... trauma, I suppose. Not just from dying, but with being remade.

But... this was the first time dying because of someone who had been an ally to me, for the longest time. ... But I knew something was going to end up happening. That's why I was going to confront her.

....

[Alex reaches her arms out and wraps them around Labrys.]

*... ... she puts an arm around Alexandra after a moment, trying to calm herself down.*

... Thank you. Sorry. This... The things that've happened now are reason for rejoicing, not focusing on the bad events that came right before it. It doesn't discount those events, but... Focusing on them right now doesn't seem like the best thing I could do. I have time now to sort out my feelings at my own pace.

Labrys.

The best thing for you to do right now is to do whatever you want. You don't have to worry about -- what you should be doing or how you should be feeling.

You've earned the right to focus on whatever the hell you want to focus on.

If you want to celebrate, we can celebrate. If you want to cry...then please, don't hold it in.

I-I....I know a little something about that.

*she shakes her head*

I want to be happy, Alexandra.

I've spent a long time being sad. Being upset. Feeling hopeless. Feeling like my duties would never end. Feeling like I would have to watch my home die. But now... so many things can happen. I have chances. My allies-- they have chances to be happy, as well. This is a reason to rejoice.

*... even though as she says that, her expression says that she'd be crying right now. You can tell just be her body language too, how she keeps her arm around you, keeping you close. How tense she is.*

I just... need time. That's all.

...

[Alexandra smiles to her.]

I understand.

You can take all the time you need.

And after you have...I'd like to. Help you figure out which chances you wanna go for. If that's okay.

*... she smiles, in that way she usually does. slight, but it more reaching her eyes than anything else.*

I'd like that.

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